So tonight sees the airing of The Inbetweeners Top 10 Moments on E4, and later this week the release of the long anticipated movie. Unfortunately, I won't be watching the movie until I get the all-clear (or at least a description of the scene) of any vomit related incidents so I can decide whether to go to the cinema or wait for the DVD release, and I hope I can do the former.
You'd think an emetophobe like myself would be one to stay away from The Inbetweeners, and that was my first impression too. Unfortunately, a delivery shift at work one night involved my colleagues watching the Series 1 DVD while waiting for the delivery to arrive, and the beginning of the episode showed a brief clip of the infamous 'Simon-throws-up-on-Carli's-brother' scene. I would have boycotted the episode had I not been in the presence of people I was still trying to make a good impression on, however I didn't want to seem like a pussy, so I stayed and watched, and to my surprise, I really enjoyed it.
I went home, and the next day began watching the first series, and although I had to mute and look away a few times on the scene mentioned above, the beginning of each episode of that series played that clip a hell of a lot, and so with that, and some structured desensitisation by watching that clip on YouTube, I became immune to that scene. Even to the extent where I found it funny. Unfortunately, I haven't become immune to the tent scene in Series 3 as of yet, because I can't work miracles, but it still hasn't stopped me from enjoying each episode (apart from the tent scene).
So, no one knows until 11 this evening what the top ten moments are, so as a bit of fun (mainly for myself as I have nothing better to do while I wait for my dinner), I've put together my top ten Inbetweeners moments.
10. Series 3 - Episode 3 - Will's Dillema - "Waterside" - Jay and Neil spot Mr Gilbert admring fluffy toys, and the next day tease him about it by saying "waterside" around him. Leading to them getting detention.
9. Series 2 - Episode 1 - The Field Trip - Jay looks for his 'seaside MILF' - The awkward moment where Jay thinks the ice-cream lady is the "yummy mummy who wants me to spunk on her tummy" and awkwardly asks her "can you suck me off?"
8. Series 1 - Episode 2 - Bunk Off - "Bumder" - Will gets drunk and ends up calling Neil's dad a 'bumder' - a mixture of 'bummer' and 'bender.'
7. Series 2 - Episode 4 - Night Out in London - "Bus Wankers" - After successfully yelling "bus wankers" at people, Jay tries it again in London, but it backfires.
6. Series 2 - Episode 1 - The Field Trip - Punching a Fish - After Simon falls into the water, things go from bad to worse when they catch a fish - and Neil decides the most humane way to kill it - punching it to death.
5. Series 3 - Episode 4 - Trip to Warwick - "Tactical Wank" Gone Wrong - After Simon fails to get an erection after taking Jay's advice to have a 'tactical wank,' he ends up getting angry. Really angry.
4. Series 2 - Episode 5 - Duke of Edinburgh Awards - Jay Gets Caught - Jay goes into a room he thinks is empty for a 'quick tug' but ends up getting caught by an old lady in there. And then by Daisy and the old woman's son.
3. Series 1 - Episode 3 - Thorpe Park - "Inconsiderate Assholes!" - Will kicks off when people are already sat at the front of Nemesis Inferno calling them "inconsiderate assholes" - but it turns out they're from the Happy Foundation, a charity for people with Down Syndrome.
2. Series 2 - Episode 2 - Work Experience - Simon Gets Lucky - Simon meets Hannah, who suddenly starts to give him a handjob in the middle of an under 18s disco while Jay, Neil and Will watch. As Jay puts it "well, thanks to me, we're now watching Simon get wanked off."
1. Series 3 - Episode 1 - The Fashion Show - Wardrobe Malfunction - While hurrying to put on a revealing costume to help Carli, and worrying about getting an erection, Simon suffers an embarassing wardrobe malfunction, which he isn't even aware of...
My number one moment was the one I voted for in the poll that E4 ran, although personally, I think the top moment will most likely be "Bus wankers." Some of my favourite moments didn't actually make it into the poll, I think the way they should have done it was have everyone submit their favourite moment without having to choose from a list, and then drawing a shortlist from that, then perhaps doing a vote. Still, there were some pretty good ones in their poll.
Sunday 14 August 2011
Tuesday 9 August 2011
Making a paddling pool look deep: Why magazines make women look shallow.
I read a lot of magazines. Mainly because I have no friends here currently and also no job as no one wants to employ me. But also, simply because I like it. I like the features more than anything as opposed to the celebrity crap and the fashion and beauty pages, but what annoys me, is that women's magazines seem to go out of their depths to make us seem unbelievably shallow.
I'm not going to name names here, as most womens magazines do it, so I'll just mention them collectively. Aside from a couple of features in monthly/weekly issues depending on the magazine, they seem to talk about nothing but fashion, beauty and celebrities. It makes it sound like it's all we care about, whereas frankly, I couldn't care less.
I mean, I couldn't give a shit what looks hot on the catwalks right now, most of which they only advertise stuff in shops that I could never afford to shop in on a student budget. I don't care if the top is a replica of something hot of the catwalk, I refuse to pay £25 for a TOP. Obviously, I like to look nice and wear nice clothes, but at the end of the day, I like living in my flat and eating. Something which has priority over looking nice I'd think.
Beauty tips aren't that bad, because some of them are helpful at times, some of which I've read and have thought they were genius ideas and have used them every single day afterwards, but as far as the make up they talk about, who in their right mind would pay anything over a fiver for a mascara? It's your eyelashes for crying out loud. Something which people are rarely going to see up close, unless you gaze into your boyfriend's eyes a lot or something, but even so, most guys probably don't care what your eyelashes look like.
I buy make up, and I wear it every day, but I refuse to pay anything over a tenner for the lot. Call me cheap if you must, but I just don't see the point. Cheaper brands like Miss Sporty still do the job, although I draw the line at using make up out of cheap gift sets and from places like Poundland.
What's probably the worst in these magazines is the celebrity news though. By all means have it, but don't fill up half of your magazine with it. I don't know who actually physically worries themselves over what Taylor Swift wore at the Teen Choice awards, or how stressful Kim Kardashian's wedding plans are (on a side note, surely with all the money she has she can afford a wedding planner to do it all for her?). Yeah people might be interested, but I wouldn't have thought anything like that is an OMG! moment, especially not with the stuff going on in this country right now.
I'm not going to say I completely boycott the celeb news, because I don't. If it's a celebrity I'm interested in, I will read whatever feature it is, but thankfully, most of the celebs I'm interested in are stars of Desperate Housewives and The Big Bang Theory, and in this country, you don't always get a lot of news about them unless you purposely look for it, which I don't have the time to do (although you'd think I would, not having a job or anything). A few members of the Glee cast are in magazines now and again, and I'll gladly read that, as I'm a massive Gleek, but I'm saying if it wasn't there, I wouldn't be bothered and I wouldn't be frantically Googling them to find out what's going on with them right now, as there's more important things to worry about.
Some features in magazines I have found useful, and I'm not going to lie, if I find something in a magazine that interests me or I find useful or I just enjoy reading, I cut it out and keep it to refer back to. That probably makes me sound shallow in itself, but it's things like money saving tips, recipes, tips on how to be more confident etc, and I do read things and think "ooh, must try that."
I just hate the idea that all magazines seem to think that the only thing women worry about are clothes, make up, hair and celebrities, because I'm sure 90% at least of the female population in this country don't prioritise any of those. I know I don't. I worry about how much money's in my bank account, whether I'll ever find a job, whether I'll make some more stable friends at uni this year, my relationships, my family, my health, what's going on in the world etc, and I'm sure that's the same with most women.
Still despite these annoyances, I'll keep on reading magazines for the appealing features.
Finally, on a brief note, I can't blog at this time without mentioning the current riots going on.
What scares me the most is the fact these people obviously know what damage they're doing to people's lives and homes, but they're still willing to cause all this disruption, and now the first fatality has been confirmed. How many people are going to have to be killed in order for them to realise that enough is enough? Those doing it are just scum and deserve whatever punishment's coming to them. If they want to fight they should get their scummy shit faced asses to Afghanistan, where real men who have families and are risking their lives are fighting a war, unlike the disgusting wastes of space that are tearing up their own cities for virtually no reason. Thoughts are with everyone affected and hoping that all this nastiness ends soon. x
I'm not going to name names here, as most womens magazines do it, so I'll just mention them collectively. Aside from a couple of features in monthly/weekly issues depending on the magazine, they seem to talk about nothing but fashion, beauty and celebrities. It makes it sound like it's all we care about, whereas frankly, I couldn't care less.
I mean, I couldn't give a shit what looks hot on the catwalks right now, most of which they only advertise stuff in shops that I could never afford to shop in on a student budget. I don't care if the top is a replica of something hot of the catwalk, I refuse to pay £25 for a TOP. Obviously, I like to look nice and wear nice clothes, but at the end of the day, I like living in my flat and eating. Something which has priority over looking nice I'd think.
Beauty tips aren't that bad, because some of them are helpful at times, some of which I've read and have thought they were genius ideas and have used them every single day afterwards, but as far as the make up they talk about, who in their right mind would pay anything over a fiver for a mascara? It's your eyelashes for crying out loud. Something which people are rarely going to see up close, unless you gaze into your boyfriend's eyes a lot or something, but even so, most guys probably don't care what your eyelashes look like.
I buy make up, and I wear it every day, but I refuse to pay anything over a tenner for the lot. Call me cheap if you must, but I just don't see the point. Cheaper brands like Miss Sporty still do the job, although I draw the line at using make up out of cheap gift sets and from places like Poundland.
What's probably the worst in these magazines is the celebrity news though. By all means have it, but don't fill up half of your magazine with it. I don't know who actually physically worries themselves over what Taylor Swift wore at the Teen Choice awards, or how stressful Kim Kardashian's wedding plans are (on a side note, surely with all the money she has she can afford a wedding planner to do it all for her?). Yeah people might be interested, but I wouldn't have thought anything like that is an OMG! moment, especially not with the stuff going on in this country right now.
I'm not going to say I completely boycott the celeb news, because I don't. If it's a celebrity I'm interested in, I will read whatever feature it is, but thankfully, most of the celebs I'm interested in are stars of Desperate Housewives and The Big Bang Theory, and in this country, you don't always get a lot of news about them unless you purposely look for it, which I don't have the time to do (although you'd think I would, not having a job or anything). A few members of the Glee cast are in magazines now and again, and I'll gladly read that, as I'm a massive Gleek, but I'm saying if it wasn't there, I wouldn't be bothered and I wouldn't be frantically Googling them to find out what's going on with them right now, as there's more important things to worry about.
Some features in magazines I have found useful, and I'm not going to lie, if I find something in a magazine that interests me or I find useful or I just enjoy reading, I cut it out and keep it to refer back to. That probably makes me sound shallow in itself, but it's things like money saving tips, recipes, tips on how to be more confident etc, and I do read things and think "ooh, must try that."
I just hate the idea that all magazines seem to think that the only thing women worry about are clothes, make up, hair and celebrities, because I'm sure 90% at least of the female population in this country don't prioritise any of those. I know I don't. I worry about how much money's in my bank account, whether I'll ever find a job, whether I'll make some more stable friends at uni this year, my relationships, my family, my health, what's going on in the world etc, and I'm sure that's the same with most women.
Still despite these annoyances, I'll keep on reading magazines for the appealing features.
Finally, on a brief note, I can't blog at this time without mentioning the current riots going on.
What scares me the most is the fact these people obviously know what damage they're doing to people's lives and homes, but they're still willing to cause all this disruption, and now the first fatality has been confirmed. How many people are going to have to be killed in order for them to realise that enough is enough? Those doing it are just scum and deserve whatever punishment's coming to them. If they want to fight they should get their scummy shit faced asses to Afghanistan, where real men who have families and are risking their lives are fighting a war, unlike the disgusting wastes of space that are tearing up their own cities for virtually no reason. Thoughts are with everyone affected and hoping that all this nastiness ends soon. x
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